I haven't had the courage (aka guts) to write anything here for a while. Haven't known what to say. Life has been tough. And sad. And unsure. And weird. And, basically, just up-in-the-air.
I'm trying to know what to do now that I'm alone. After 36 years. Things that used to interest me no longer do. Trying to put together a plan for the future if impossible. I don't know how to start that process yet.
BUT, I'm working on all those things daily. Because what are my options??!!
I'm still seeing signs of my sense of humor, every once in a while. I know it's still there. Two years of hell can take that away from you, believe me.
So, here is 2011 for me. I have pages and pages and pages in my head, but this is the "nutshell" version...
JANUARY 2011 -
A toast (and love) from good, good friends. We all knew what was ahead.
FEBRUARY 2011 - This says it all.
The last few hours.
MARCH 2011 -
The girls helping me make a plan and start figuring things out.
Well, and drink some wine!!
My first (and probably last) tattoo in memory of...
APRIL 2011 -
HUSBAND's Baseball Tailgaters making their own memory...
with future stories to be told.
Old Red Truck present.
The girls still trying to help me get my shit together!
With more wine.
MAY 2011 - The "official" goodbye. Not your normal funeral. It was amazing!
I could add 7,000 more pictures and stories...
JUNE 2011 - My First Happy Occasion. A beautiful evening. I loved every second of it.
JULY 2011 -
A big step alone.
And time to think.
Another special evening with these girls.
And more wine...
the proof... :-)
Conquered this albatross, thanks to my hard working family.
AUGUST 2011 - August was tough. Not much to take pictures of. Too many birthdays and anniversaries and memories of all. And close friends great sadness.
We made it through though, so that was something.
Plus I got to meet and hangout with NEPHEW's new housemate, Peaches.
And started spending a lot more time visiting Stevie Ray and the Trail.
For my mental health.
SEPTEMBER 2011 - My Second Happy Occasion. An entirely beautiful weekend. So fortunate to have been a part of the year of planning.
No words. Much love!
OCTOBER 2011 -
HUSBAND'S Tailgate Family again. Football season.
What camaraderie and love. Amazing.
NOVEMBER 2011 -
The ALS Walk
My Team of wonderful friends on a chilly, windy Saturday morning.
A "new" sort of Thanksgiving for us.
Had dinner at a favorite restaurant, then sprinkled some ashes and told some stories.
Did the Turkey Trot - with good friends who got up early on Thanksgiving morning so I wouldn't be alone!
And had a lovely, magical holiday dinner with new(ish) friends.
DECEMBER 2011 -
Said goodbye to her after 13 years. RIP.
And hello to her (comes with this monthly payment thing, damnit!). Another first, alone.
And, again, these girls! They've been with me for dozens of years.
They've held my hand every second of the past year.
Couldn't have made it without them.
So that's my year... the short, light version.
So far 2012 has started out with a constipated furnace and kitty anal gland issues.
Still time for an upswing though!!
I hope to write more entertaining things here in the near future.
