THE IMPORTANCE OF VITAMIN WATER

Who knows what they put in vitamin water and call it some sort of enhanced liquid beverage.  I could probably make my own.  Really.

Husband drinks a lot of it.  Pancho and Luci like it also.

Luci likes the whole package.  The plastic wrapping, the box, etc.  A cool cat-house.

Luci's tail is 7 feet long.

Pancho, however, just says hey it's a box.  Screw the plastic.

So, I see vitamin water as having multiple/differing/who-cares benefits.

I do know that I have other, better things I can add if I want to jazz up my water.

ON A SERIOUS NOTE....

Stephen Colbert had a report tonight on the Colbert Report about BP (British Petroleum, the Corporation/Scumbags responsible for the environmental catastrophe of major proportion, we, the Gulf Coast of the US - not BRITAIN, are currently faced with!!).

I find a little bit on humor wherever I can, keep in mind.  This is not funny, in reality.

Colbert said that BP was putting out a newsletter letting their "supporters" know that everything was going just great.  And, Colbert said,  they even put a KID'S page in the newsletter. Keep in mind this is Stephen Colbert's wicked sense of humor, as he's being serious.

Here is what Colbert showed as the kid's page.....

FIND THE SEA CREATURES IN THIS PICTURE......

NOTHING shows the impact of the damage more that that.

Responsibility.

THE FAMILY JEWELS -OR- BODY PART PROTECTION

My good friend, Wendy, sent me a funny email a few weeks ago.  And, as you know, it only takes a suggestion of something for me to become obsessed with a particular topic.

Here's what her email said............

"Little Known Fact. . .  The first testicular guard , the 'cup', was used in hockey in 1874.  The first helmet was used in 1974.  That means it took 100 years for men to realize that the brain was also important."

        

Yes, well....... the bra was invented in 1913.  Somewhere between the hockey cup and the hockey helmet, a woman, Mary Jacob, thought she needed to invent a female contraption.  

                              

Yeah, whatever.  She should burn in hell.

I've never looked this happy about putting on a bra, OR wearing it for 10 hours.  I DO look this happy when I take it off, though.  What a great feeling to take that bra off at the end of the day!  The girls sing a little song!

Wonder how men would feel after wearing the cup or the helmet for 8 or 10 hours every day?

Just something I thought about today.

THE COMPANY CAR

I've always thought how great it would be to have a work car, a company-owned vehicle...... owned by the people you work for.... they love you so much that they are going to give you a cool way to get to and from work, and around town. 

You won't have to pay for flat tires, a dead battery, a dead AC compressor, new fan belts, new shocks, change the oil, fix the #$@%-up power windows, or the CHECK ENGINE light when it comes on.  You won't have to pay for the inspection or the registration. They, your employer, will take care of everything.  It's just a "here, valued employee, is a token of our appreciation and enjoy it" vehicle.  AND THEY WILL FIX THE CHECK ENGINE LIGHT THING!  And, did I mention, that they will take care of the CHECK. ENGINE. LIGHT. PROBLEM.!!

Just a new, comfortable, stylish car.  In silver, or mauve, or powder blue, OR MAYBE BLACK!!
Provided to you because they appreciate what you do for them. The Work Vehicle.  The Company Car.

I've always thought that would be so great............  Unless THIS was your Company Car ........

What if you had to drive THIS all day?!  I'm not sure I would be so excited about dragging myself out of bed at 6:00 in the morning, slathering on make-up, figuring out what to wear (again), feeding the cats, and headin' out in this!!  So all day long, THIS is what you're going to be driving around in.

The two young (aging 30's) women in this customized Mini-Cooper-with-a-huge-Red-Bull-can-on-top car were clueless about the busy highway they were approaching, because they were both on their cell phones, texting and talking, simultaneously, laughing, having a great time. Then, they took off at 200 miles an hour when the light changed.  I couldn't keep up with them in my 12 year old Ford. 

They were a fine representation of how great life could be if you consumed their product.  So I think they deserved their Company Car.  I just hope they have a back-up for grandma's funeral.

Be careful what you wish for......

I love my 12 year old Ford.

RESTING SPACES

Thought process #1 -
I'm an observer-of-things.  Weird things, mostly.  But things in general.  I'm a people watcher.  For me, that's the main reason for flying ANYWHERE - watching people. Oh, and maybe the vacation.  But, mainly, it's because I get to watch different people.  (And we are an entertaining bunch!!)

Thought process #2 -
I love my cats, Pancho and Luci.

Thought process #3 -
I think there is a lot to be learned in human-life from our pets, by just observing.

Blending this all together -
In my projects tonight I had some empty "containers" available.  Here is what Pancho and Luci did with them.....

        

This is Pancho, the MALE cat, cramming himself in the 9 x 13 plastic box.  And, instantly, going to lala land.  His Nirvana.

                          

And here is Luci, the FEMALE, opting for the larger space.  Needin' some room.  Lookin' around.

I'm just contemplating and processing the male/female dynamic here.

And I'm thinkin' I understand it.

We can, for sure, learn a lot from our pets.

Or maybe not.

IS THAT A BANANA IN YOUR POCKET, OR.....

Husband and I have always liked to play with each other.  We can take a topic beyond normal discussion.  We've been known to plant things in each others spaces.  Mail weird things to each other.  Buy questionable things for each other.  Etc. Etc. Etc.  We'd do this just because it was something that came up in a conversation.  Or something we wanted to tease each other about.  We have wicked senses of humor, and especially with each other.

One night last week, he brought me a small package that had arrived in the mail.  He said honey I ordered something for you.  He wanted to watch while I opened it, so I was a little suspect.  He was smiling.

Here is what was in the package......

So I said well thanks big guy but are you going to show me what I'm supposed to do with this?

He said I sure will honey.  He still had a big grin on his face.

So I inspected it a bit further and realized that, on one side, it said "Banana Bunker".  Still, STILL, I was goin' way off on that.....  Husband was losing it.  He couldn't breathe he was laughing so hard.  He knew what was going through MY head.

Here is what it was.

It's seriously a protective device for a banana.  Something to keep your banana from getting squished in your backpack or your lunchbox or your purse.

Yes, it comes apart so you can INSERT THE BANANA.   So you can see the Banana Bunker tattoo on this side/piece/tip.  WHATEVER!!  ( I do NOT believe that some men could EVER get through this process successfully.)  

                                                                                                                 

Here you can see what a contribution to the busy life style it can be (from their website).  You can shove that banana anywhere you want it, and it will still be hard and firm when you want to eat it.  :-)

And it comes in colors.  Five colors.  Why?

Daughter saw it and said hey that's great. I could use one of those in my backpack.  I just looked at her like she was from alien parents.  How had we NOT passed on our extraordinary senses of humor to her?  Of course, I guess she didn't want to think about what her mom was thinking it might have been!  Or where we thought this particular humor came from.

I hope the Banana Bunker people make millions off of this because it provided enormous humor in our life right now.  

A JOURNEY - THE EARLY YEARS

Husband and I have been together for a billion years.  A billion.  More than any other couple on the planet. And we've never had an argument or a fight or a disagreement.  NOT!!!!!!!

OK, we HAVE been together for a billion years.  But we have had arguments, fights, and disagreements of MAJOR proportion.  We've always been "vocal debaters".  We "talked loudly". We've always had "healthy discussions".  And I used to be a "thrower".  There are some broken things in our past!  I'm not a "thrower" anymore.  I'm a recovering "thrower" for more than 20 years.  Amen.  You don't get a chip for that one, though.  I deserve one. (I'm a door-slammer, now.)

Husband and I both have our own VERY strong beliefs.  Luckily most of his beliefs and mine line up.  And most of those beliefs are of the liberal, free-thinking, make-sure-you-know-what-you're-doing, kind.  We try to be open-minded about things.  Works most of the time.

We have been together, on and off, from 5th grade on.  We grew up together in the same small Texas town.  We did everything together.  When we were speaking to each other, that is.  We dated other people, got back together, dated other people, got back together, dated other people, got back together.

Until about age 15.

We found OTHER reasons, at age 15, to be attracted to each other!  And other things to do!

We KNEW, however, even then, how to keep from contributing to the planet's population.  Yes we did. And managed to do so until the ages of 27.  We should do a PSA, like Sarah Palin's daughter, don't you think?  Only, I'm sure, we could one-up her, for obvious reasons. (Oh, gosh, I might have gone too far here, once again.)  Anywaaayyyyy............

Here are some pictures from our early years together. These pictures are in my head forever. Tattooed to the inside of my eyelids. Nothing could change them. I still love this man so much. We aren't going to be able to grow old together, as it turns out. But at least we got an early start.

This is Husband in his junior year of high school.  He was not nearly as tough as he thought he was.  He signed the picture very respectfully (albeit arrogantly!).  He wrote different things on the back, however!

And do you think this is the '70's or what????  I MADE the short prom dress on the right, so I guess I wanted it THAT short.  I'm sure I wasn't worrying too much about it when I wore it, though.  Check out the shoes in that picture, on both of us!!!  I think I can still feel my feet in those shoes when I look at them. And look at the blue suit Husband is wearing on the left. WHY would I have ever gone anywhere with a guy dressed in this suit?!  It was crushed-velvet!!!  Saturday Night Fever-ish, even before Saturday Night Fever.  And the tie?  Makes me shiver now. We were stylin' at the time, though.  And my hair, jeez.  I actually HAD curls.  I had to IRON my hair to get it to look like this.  And where were my bangs?  Did I not realize I needed bangs on that huge forehead?  I think we'd both had too much Strawberry Hill on both occasions. Or Pabst Blue Ribbon. Or Cherry Vodka.  And there might have been some other things thrown in there, too.  Ahh, the 70's!

This is Husband with his John Lennon glasses, and his summer haircut, and his summer tan, and his summer biceps from working on the dock at Lake Whitney.  How cute is he!  He was 18.  I had just gotten a new kitten, Sam, and Husband was trying his best to like him. (He's still trying his best, even today, with Pancho and Luci.)

                                 

AND, high school graduation pictures.........  Check out my hair!  Farrah Fawcett, eat your heart out!  Well, it was an effort, at least.  And, I've realized that I didn't have full eyebrows even then - only half.  Maybe I was born without them. Hum.

This is probably my favorite picture of our "pre-marriage" years.  I was a senior in high school.  Husband was a freshman in college.  We were, obviously, very grown up! This was the Christmas dance-1972. I made this dress also. It was one of my favorites. I wish I still had it (like I could fit into it!) just to wear around the house. It was VELVET and it weighed 7,000 pounds. I'm pretty sure Husband was holding me up in this picture. Although, maybe for different reasons! Again, the 70's!!!!  I can still feel his hand on my shoulder, and how happy we were on that night.

And then we got married.  At 19!  And why not. We'd done everything else.

Then we moved to Austin for college. And a whole different life began................

WRITER'S BLOCK

I have writer's block.

Just for five or six days though.  So it's not major.  Or maybe it is.  I DON'T KNOW.

I'm not seeing or finding those things that send me way off to another dimension.

I just can't find the humor right now.  OR appropriate humor, that is.  Or anything else to write about.

Well, actually I have lots, LOTS to write about, but just don't see the need.  Nothing has popped into the brain for me lately that has to be embellished upon.

What is going on?  I NEVER have nothing to say (double negative, I know).

I might have exceeded my expectations.  Topped out.  Gone beyond my potential.  Taken a nap.

Whatever.

PUNCTUATION

i have lots of words in my head and lots of stuff to say but im not a very good editor and i wasnt a good english student and I only took english in college when I had to and only if they let me read beowulf and king arthur stuff i really didnt care too much about where punctuation was supposed to go and i only think i learned about punctuation a couple of years ago

i know i KNOW some of my friends are going to have a hard time knowing this about me and hearing me say these things so im trying to make it even harder for them by not using ANY punctuation at all in this  and im pretty sure the grammar aint that good either

i just like to write stuff and do it while its in my brain and i dont spend much time on periods or quotation marks etc  i DO however like the EXCLAMATION mark!!!!!!! i use it a lot  it makes a point and shouts at you i really like capital letters too  i also like the hyphen and the comma if i dont know if its two sentences or one i use a comma and if i dont know if its a compound word or two words i use a hyphen and if i dont know what to do for dinner i order take out and delivery is even better

and sometimes i combine whole different thought processes about totally different things and assume everyone is following along just fine

so what Im saying is that im not worried about editing thats what im trying to say so dont think wow she really should proof read this because just know that she already did proof read it

sorry brenda melissa b  melissa h sylvia and those arent their real names

. ! - ,

A GOOD MOTHER

We had a fawn show up in our yard a couple of weeks ago.  Tiny.  Looking like it needed help.  Husband had almost gotten it to come up to his hand but then it ran away.  That was the last we saw of it for a few days. Then we saw it, at least we thought it was the same one, tear through the backyard a week later, and I started noticing plants in the yard being gnawed on below the three foot level.

Husband spotted the fawn again one morning several days ago, still in the back yard.  We were worried that it was trapped, not being old enough to jump the fences, which is what I'm sure his mom had done.  The baby kept briefly appearing.  We weren't sure what to do about it.

For the past three or four nights Husband has been watching and mom shows up every evening around dusk.  And the baby is always in about the same spot, still inside the fence, laying down, at the time she shows up.  Mom has been on guard, apparently.  We assume she's been waiting for baby to get big enough to jump the fence.  We just weren't sure how we should interfere with the process.

You can see mom just left of center, and then baby against the fence laying down.

It just amazes me.  The power of the motherhood thing.

We left all the gates open tonight.  We're hoping the baby got out and that mom can get some sleep now!!

What we as a society could learn from this, don't you think!!

THUNDERSTORM

We had a true Texas thunderstorm tonight, "out here" in way, far, South Austin.  It was a good one.  Trees were bending in all sorts of ways that you don't want to see trees bend.  Things were creaking and banging and hitting the roof.  I LOVE thunderstorms.  LOVE rain.  But this one had even me a bit freaked out.

Here was Luci, during the thunderstorm tonight......

I'm thinking that she's saying shit mom what was that?!  She's an Illinois girl.  Doesn't know about Texas thunderstorms.  She's just used to barns being blown around.

And here was Luci 10 minutes AFTER the thunderstorm......

Pancho, however,  HAD NOT MOVED through the whole thunderstorm drama.

God, I love my cats.